Being A Woman 101!

 

 

Being a WOMAN 101

If you intend to attract your soulmate or true love or good real friendships this is the way to do it, I guarantee it will work! Give it a shot, you have nothing to lose, except the wrong person!

 

1. Self-love – this is extremely important. If you don’t love yourself, what you look like, who you are, what you can do, etc. then you cannot love anyone right. You need to take care of you and love what you see when you look in the mirror, be happy with the actions you took daily and what you said or did to and for others and for yourself. Take care of you so you can take care of others otherwise you will repel people and lose friends and relationships will suffer and you will be miserable. You must come first and when you ask God for help ask God to help you learn to love yourself, check out Pinterest and look for a pin about 31 ways to practice self-love; loving yourself will make you sparkle and glow and people will want to be near you and be in your glow and circle. Let the circle of love start with you. Don’t buy into giving all of your love away to the point of exhaustion and self-hatred. Make sure you allow others to give you love and you can only do that if you love yourself….your thick or think thighs, your  long or short hair, your light or dark skin, your fashionable or cheap clothes, your plain or made up face, your blemishes or clear skin, etc. Love it all and let the world know you love all of you because you are already loved by God no matter who you are, what you have done or what you look like, so that means you might as well love what your creator loves because God doesn’t care that you have space between your teeth or wooly and unmanageable hair. Why do you think there are so many different looking women in the world? And, God loves them all, including you so love yourself so you can love others and they can love you.

2. Music - music is healing and can be therapy if you allow it to be and sometimes women get angry and lash out or run to something that is unhealthy or dangerous and addictive. I say turn up the volume on your favorite tunes and let it soothe you and calm you down. It works like a charm.

3. Food – eat good and healthy food so you stay strong and keep your stamina up – food makes or breaks your day and your life – treat yourself right and make eating healthy a daily habit (at least 3 healthy and well balanced meals a day), you will feel much better about who you are and about what you can do in life and you will glow. Your hair will be shiny and healthy no matter the length, your nails will grow long and stay strong, and your skin will have a healthy glow because you are what you eat.

4. Hygiene – self-explanatory and hugely important – no decent man wants a woman that doesn’t take care of her hygiene from top to bottom – please shower every day after you are out and about in the dirty world. Women love manicures and pedicures as much as we can afford it and if you can’t afford it do it yourself. Nice smelling breath is important for both sexes but women are known for making sure they are made up and smelling great, brushed teeth and regular dental visits are key. You all know this already but some women neglect that and end up not feeling so healthy and that means your hygiene suffers.

5. Friendship – it’s important to always be a good friend, be there when your friends need you and they will be there when you need them if they are true friends. Spend time with them, check up on them, offer to help when they need it, and express your love and camaraderie as often as possible. It’s hard to find a true friend in this day in age but it starts by being one yourself. Cherish the people you have in your life and be genuinely interested in them, their lives and what they have to say. Also, women, it’s great to have male friends but do your best to stay in the friendship zone without benefits, it seems people want to cross that line and ruin their friendships. If you are meant to be you will be but respect your male friends, don’t get in their way when they are interested in other women or dating, and be a soft place to land when the women in their lives treat them like crap or break their heart. Also, women have a tendency to get catty and jealous of other women a lot. This is disturbing because we are all beautiful and intelligent in our own way and we all have a lot to offer. If you feel jealousy arising in your heart because one of your girlfriends has a hot boyfriend or is about to get married or her hair is more fabulous than yours, she has more money than you do, her car is fancier than yours, she gets more attention from men, she has an awesome family that adores her, her kids treat her like a queen, she has an amazing job or runs her own business or her clothes are more expensive than yours, get over it. If you dwell on this stuff that means you don’t have much of a life and you could lose a very important and valuable friend because you are so jealous of her. Let it go, it’s just not worth it. We women need to stick together not get jealous of each other and plot to harm the person we are jealous of. Do your own thing to make yourself shine in a different way and remember what I said about self-love. You can’t be anyone other than yourself. 

You can’t work at your friends job if you don’t have those skills, you can’t flip your long flowing hair around if you have short hair,  you can’t change your skin color unless you have a ton of money and you go get it bleached and if you do that no one will probably want to be around you because that’s flat out crazy, you can’t drive a Mercedes if you can only afford a Honda, you can’t get married if you are not dating and haven’t found the one man you want to spend your life with. So stop getting so jealous of your girlfriends or holding on to that jealousy because you don’t want to lose the very friend that has stuck by you through thick and thin just because she has something you don’t. She worked very hard for what she has and she has made efforts in areas that maybe you are too afraid to make an effort in. She earned what she has and if it was handed to her in any way then she got lucky somewhere in the game of life. Rejoice with her and vow to make sure you get some luck and blessings as well by appreciating what your friends have and working hard to get what you want. Stealing and cattiness is for children and weak women. You don’t want to be weak, you want to be a great friend so act like one and let go of the jealousy, it’s just not worth it.

6. Connection to God – first and foremost, prayer is huge – (my homemade prayer guide is on Slideshare, just ask and I will send you the link or you can get a copy on my Facebook Jesus net page at www.facebook.com/thejesusnet look under the “Services” or “Offers” tab) – ask for help and build a consistent and daily relationship with God if you desire to do so. Women who are close to God exhibit a beauty from the inside out and when a man gets involved with a woman who has a heart for God he will know she will definitely love him and treat him with the utmost respect. More women than men rely on their relationship with God and their spirituality to deal with the upsets in life and that means women are strong because they know they can seek their source for strength at any time.  So seek God daily and whether things are going great or not. Also, make it a practice to read your Bible and go to church as much as possible. A woman’s relationship with God will determine how she treats others and lives her life. And don’t forget your sons are always watching you and they need to see that you turn to God for what you need, not dependence on a man all the time. It will teach them to be secure when they meet a woman who seems like she has it all together. Your sons will know how to treat a woman and how to treat all females and their own daughters if they should have one because of your connection to God. Your daughters will watch you too and learn that they don’t have to walk around shaking their butts, dressing overly sexy or defiling their bodies with every man that comes along because they are afraid of being alone or not getting attention. They will be too strong to let that happen and so strong that they can wait for the right man to come along before they give their essence away.

7. Privacy – keep other people’s business and personal life and information confidential and private including your own – some people like to harm others and steal when they get jealous or see something or know something they want or want to destroy – so don’t go around blabbing about something you know should be kept secret. If you want people to stay out of your business, then stay out of theirs. Don’t tell all of your girlfriends about how amazing your man is because they are not all your friends and the wrong person may hear it and make it her business to try to steal your man away. Keep it in the closet and keep your relationship safe from being broken into. Also, if you tell your male friends about your awesome boyfriend or husband he may try to steal you away by doing more or better than he is doing or even plotting to harm him. Men do that all the time so practice being a private person. This goes for how much money you have, how perfect your home is and every time you get props at work. People get jealous for stupid reasons and that means some things are better left unsaid.

8. Family – stay close to your family and treat them with respect and dignity, support them, forgive them but don’t put up with evil from any of them, no one deserves that. Be a good sister, cousin, aunt, girlfriend, wife and friend. Teach your own family how to be family oriented and respect their blood before strangers. The family bond is important and vital to how you get on in the world. You will know your family first before anyone else in the world if you are blessed to be born into a family. Some people are orphans and grow up in orphanages or foster care and they don’t feel like they have a family at all. If that is your case I say find a group of friends that are like a family to you and hold on to that bond. If you have a hard time doing that and tend to be a loner but you want that family feel in your life, then ask God to grant that to you in your life and cherish it when it comes. Family members die all the time whether they are biological or not so don’t take your family for granted.

9. Transportation – I know sometimes it’s tough and circumstances may force you to take public transportation, nothing wrong with that…however, we live in a dangerous world full of evil people who like to get freaky and crazy at night and sometimes in the daylight. So having a car will help a woman feel safer, especially when it comes to dating and meeting up with men. The sooner you are able to take care of this I say do it.

10. Finances – make sure you provide for yourself and are able to afford what you need and want in life – men can be gold diggers too and men have this overwhelming need to control women, especially if they are lacking the financial resources to get by in life. If you run into a bunch of men that shy away from you or are intimidated by you because you have money, then they are not worth your time. Men can feel insecure when a woman is financially secure because he wants to provide for her and hold on to her and for some reason men think money is the way to do that. Men also think they should be the ones with the most money because of their egos and machoism (they may feel like less of a man if a woman makes more money that he does and that’s ridiculous, but a societal norm). Sure, there are women that want a man to wine and dine her and buy her gifts all the time, but those women are money hungry and need to feel safe with a wealthy man. That is not true love. You can’t buy love and if a man happens to lose everything a woman will probably run to the next man that has plenty of money to take care of her. If you have your own finances then you will be well prepared to take care of yourself if your man happens to walk away or loses everything. A woman needs financial security at all times.

11. Career/Work – do your best to find the career or work that makes you feel good about yourself and where you can serve others and support your lifestyle. Women who are on a mission to serve others and love going to work on Monday are usually out in the world making a difference. Be your own boss and do your own thing because women are powerful in business and we can handle all of that power like men can. So love what you do or do something else. I have to shun prostitution because I know so many women do this to make a lot of money because they don’t want that 9-5 or they don’t feel worthy enough to snag that dream job, or they were forced into it. You are worth more than that so love and take care of your temple (see #14) don’t use it to make money.

12. Remorse – apologize in person, letter, email or by phone to anyone you have harmed in any way – it takes courage to say you are sorry so be brave and let it rip, you will be more respected when you admit you were wrong and it’s not weakness, it’s strength. For both men and women it can be difficult to approach the one you hurt and apologize and that is a shame and pride thing. So swallow your pride, you are not perfect, you made a mistake acknowledge and let go of the shame so you can forgive yourself and be open to fixing the mistake or resolving any conflict.

13. Brain – take care of your brain by letting go of addictions like drugs, alcohol and cigarettes and marijuana (yes marijuana is bad for the brain – look it up, brainy gals are sexy not stoners)  – do brain teasers and play games to strengthen your brain and eat good and healthy food. (Cauliflower and walnuts work wonders for the brain – they actually look like the brain so that should tell you something).

14. Physique – take care of your body by exercising and doing what you need to stay strong and healthy – you might have to pick up kids one day or lift heavy objects, or fight someone off to defend yourself. A strong core will help you walk and sit upright, give you a strong back and make you feel great about the way your abs look. Your body is  your temple so you have to believe that and take care of it. You can’t live in anyone else’s body because if you did you wouldn’t be able to take them over and be them. They would still look like them and they would be doing the physical work, not you. So be yourself and cherish the home that God gave you, it’s unique, it’s special, it is beautiful, it is yours and only yours. Don’t allow any man or woman to take advantage of your body and use it for their pleasure without giving that pleasure back to you in return the way you deserve to receive it. Make sure anyone that touches you does so with a gentle and kind touch and with the intent to express love and affection, not harm and abuse.

15. Self-Control – it is important to always have self-control, you don’t want to hurt someone or yourself or do something you will regret tremendously later because you couldn’t control your tongue or your actions. Practice this every day and make sure you learn how to manage your emotions because if you can’t anything goes and that’s dangerous for you and anyone around you. Women have been known to rape men as well by drugging them and having their way with their bodies either because they want a man they can’t have or they have lost their mind and can’t control their anger. Don’t do this, respect a man’s body as you would want him to respect yours, that is his.  So keep your hands to yourself until you are invited to touch. All women know what that means. Women can get very emotional at times and if we are not able to control or deal with our emotions we will spit hurtful words at someone or do something vengeful and no self-respecting lady needs to do that. I saw this acronym for Bitch once and it stood for B – Babe, I – In, T- Total, C-Control, O-Of, H-Herself and I thought wow, that is so cool. It’s a twist from being called something derogatory to demean you or put you down. So if someone calls you a bitch tell them, “yes, thank you I am a bitch because I am a babe in total control of herself”. Always be in control!

16. Authenticity (Be yourself) – this is HUGE! It is unattractive when you try to be someone or something that you are not, so do yourself and everyone else a favor and let people be who they are and you be who you are. You will gain more friends and be happier with who you are when you learn to love yourself and get to know who you really are. I recommend reading up on your zodiac sign and rising sign, taking some personality tests, finding out what your interests are, etc. Then wear yourself proud and loud so people know you are comfortable in your own skin and you trust your own opinions, thoughts and ideas. You don’t need to be Heather because behind all of that long flowing hair and seemingly perfect body and awesome life could be lice or hair loss, a pudge of fat somewhere that she hates and tries to hide and a life filled with heartache and pain. We never see what is behind the smiles and closed doors of the people we want to emulate or the people we are so jealous of. So remember that the next time you want someone else’s life or hair or car or body or boyfriend. They are hiding something that you probably cannot handle so just be yourself and deal with your own life and do your best to love who you are inside and out and that means taking the necessary efforts and steps to better yourself.

17. Protection – Keep yourself and the ones you love SAFE!! Make sure you are always protecting those that you claim to love. Actions speak louder than words, so take care of your loved ones, keep them safe from harm and danger. Evil lurks on every corner. Protect yourself from predator men because if you are an easy target for manipulation and abuse men will know that from a distance. They have radar and they will know what kind of woman you are just by looking at you and observing your manner and behavior. So be careful and be on guard but don’t put up a wall so tall that no one can see over it at all. Trust and protection go hand in hand. When you do trust others that earn your trust you are also protecting yourself from being alone all the time and that squashes loneliness.

18. Compliments - Always wish the best for everyone – if someone you know does something amazing celebrate them and wish them well. It looks good on you and you move closer to the object of your affection and your friendships will blossom, and people will like you more and want to be around you. If you never compliment your girlfriends or sisters or mom or other people or you rarely do it or do it in a sneaky way like complimenting something minor like a photo on FB and ignore something amazing your friend did like land her dream job then she will know that you are jealous of her. It’s obvious and it makes you look bad. So let go of the petty jealousies all because you don’t have what someone else has. So what, get your own stuff or do your own thing and get your own compliments. Again, you cannot be someone else, you can’t do what someone else was meant to do or be who someone else was meant to be. Genuinely compliment others as much as you can and you will genuinely be complimented. What goes around comes around.

19. Squash jealousy – I will reiterate what I said above in a different way….everyone gets jealous at some point but the challenge is not to let it consume you. You need to squash it so you don’t go around harming someone because they have something you want or because you want to be better than they are. Be yourself, you have your own talents and abilities, you are amazing just because you were born and you have to go after what you want in life without the desire to harm someone or take something that doesn’t belong to you or that you didn’t work for yourself. You don’t have the right to do that. If you are too jealous of someone I suggest letting them go and staying far away from them so you can let the jealousy go.

20. Patience – Being a lady or decent strong woman requires waiting for what you want in life. Allow others to come to you when they are ready so the timing will be right, everything will flow and there will be nothing but peace. Force and coercion is not attractive and makes you look like you are not able to obtain what you are striving for. Wait and it will be all the more sweeter when you get what you want because you will be ready for it and it will help you grow and blossom spiritually and as a woman! Ebb and flow is worth watching and waiting for. I think women are better with patience than men are because we have to carry babies for almost ten months. That’s over half of a year of waiting for your bundle of joy that you have nourished and loved for so long to come out and meet you and the world. Men do not understand that as much as women so we have more patience. However, we as real and decent women can teach a man how to be patient and wait for what he wants. This can also be said about sexual contact. 

Men have no problem taking what comes to them easily but the problem is it came to easy and too soon so they take it for granted and get bored and will probably mess around. You don’t want that so make him wait, let him know you are worth the wait and if he is decent and meant to get your heart and body, which he needs to earn, then you will be much happier in your relationship. He will want to hold on to you because you are a force to be reckoned with. I know the way of the world is full of dating sites and social media sites where people send penis and vagina and breast and butt pics and sexting is hugely popular. But you don’t have to be like the world. Sounds boring to me. I would rather let a man wonder about what lies underneath and imagine what I look like until I am ready to show him. Then, he will say she was worth waiting for and I don’t want to let her go because she is not as easy as other women. That’s not boring, that’s sexy and trust me men want that. They just happen to accept what is thrown at them most of the time because it’s easy and they love sex. But they will wait if you make them wait and give them a reason to. So be patient with your pursuit for love and connection because you don’t want to connect with the wrong man and there are way too many wrong men in the world. It takes time to find the right one, so wait it out and enjoy your life in the meantime.

21. Fun – if you don’t know how to have fun and be silly and enjoy yourself and your life you will be miserable. So don’t be a stick in the mud because you are so afraid of what someone will think of you. Let your hair down, be goofy and funny and find tons of ways to have fun (without alcohol, drugs, or sex). Use your imagination and don’t forget to ask others you hang out with what they like to do for fun, you just might enjoy it, so take a risk and do something different, be a kid again and learn how to play. Now that’s sexy!

22. Integrity – this one is huge too. Be as honest as you can possibly be about who you are, what you are doing and what you know about others. Lying makes you ugly and you have to constantly keep up with your lies. Some women think it is easy to lie so they can get away with stuff or make themselves seem more interesting. It’s not cool, not easy and it doesn’t make you look more interesting if the person you are lying to finds out or catches you in a lie. I think it’s better to not have done amazing things in your life and be honest about it so you can do those amazing things with someone special. Then you actually have a true story to tell. Don’t make up things to impress a man, they want to know you have flaws and make mistakes and you have learned from those mistakes and you aren’t perfect, because you are not. Men are insecure so if they find a woman who seems too perfect they may shy away from her because they don’t think they will measure up to all her perfection. It’s okay, it’s cool, chill and have some integrity so men and other people will respect you and trust you and look up to you and know they can count on you. When you are very insecure or just flat out bored or maybe you have a special spiritual ability like tapping into the psyche of other people, then it can be easy to mess around with men and test them. However, if you don’t want someone doing it to you then don’t do it to them. Men are fragile too and they deserve respect so be careful with crossing boundaries and testing people to the point of physical, mental or emotional pain. No one deserves that. Do the right thing all the time and the right thing will be done to you and not only that you will find the one you are meant to be with because he will have integrity too. If you don’t have integrity then it will be difficult to catch him and hold on to him…don’t forget that!

23. Strength – women have to carry an enormous amount of strength in their bodies, minds and spirits because being a mom is the most important job in the world. That is not to discredit the father or make the man feel like being a dad is not as important. I say that because women carry babies for almost 10 months and then have painful labor and traumatic birthing experiences. Then they do it over and over and over again to have as many children as they choose to have. Then they have to deal with a world that believes men rule it so women are suppressed, and made to feel weaker or less than and we are the ones who carry the men. So that means women have to be strong all the time. Again that doesn’t mean that a woman can’t show weakness. We can be vulnerable when we are in love or when we have children because our hearts are stolen away and we can feel like we are not as in control as we want to be. So, it is important that your man or any man knows that you will  be strong if he happens to be weak in some way or sick or messed up in the head or heart at any time. Women have a lot to deal with and in a world where the majority of sex offenders are men, women have to be on guard all the time. And, in a world where women tend to get too jealous of other women for foolish reasons women once again have to be cautious in their choice of female friends and associates. Women can get catty and downright evil in the pursuit of looking better, or having more stuff like shoes and clothes than her female counterparts. So women have to be careful who they chose to hang out with everyone is not your friend. So that means women have to exhibit an enormous amount of strength and that strength has to come from a place of survival, and the desire to be triumphant in whatever she sets her mind to do and that includes relationships.

24. Dating – Some women want to jump the gun if they meet someone amazing and get right to the relationship thing. Whoa, slow your roll, give a man time to get to know you, the real you. Wining and dining is a good thing – let a man wine and dine you and earn  your heart even if they don’t have a ton of money. There are so many free activities you can do on a date so don’t knock him if he suggests something that is low cost or free. He obviously wants to spend time with you so let him surprise you. And if you don’t have a car so what, you can get one later. Some women are gold diggers and only want to spend time with wealthy men. But, I think it’s cool to get involved with someone who is going somewhere in life and that means they don’t have everything they want right now. It takes time, a man can be in a hard place and working on getting in a good and soft place. So, I think that is fine as long as he has plans and goals and is busy sometimes. If he is worth your time he will be more interested in your heart and your brain than your body at first. Allow men to use their imagination when they are pursuing you and suggest that up front so he knows what kind of woman you are. There are so many insecure women in the world who think if they jump into bed with a man then he will stay with her and the relationship is sealed but I don’t believe men want to marry an easy woman. If she is easy with him she is probably easy with everyone. 

So date, date, and again, without having sex (yes, it’s possible if you want the right man and not a sex fiend who wants to jump your bones all the time) . It’s fun, you can be adventurous outside of closed doors and you can find out some really amazing things about the man you have affection for. Don’t rush anyone. Give them time because I don’t believe you would want anyone to rush you. Don’t worry about someone else stealing him away from you because if that happens that means it wasn’t meant to be and you just got saved from having a miserable relationship. If he can easily be stolen from you then he doesn’t deserve you in the first place. So date and allow the ebb and flow of things to evolve. Give it a chance and have fun seeing what happens in the future. Who knows if you are in the market for marriage he just might propose because you were worth waiting for and he knows he can trust you, plus he knows about how amazing you are outside of the bedroom.

25. Be Fearless – so this doesn’t mean go walking down dark allies with gangsters and challenging them all the time. Leave that to God. What I mean is if you do have fear, move through it and show your courage. Be brave when you need to step up and do something and that includes practicing the golden rule every day all day long. Men may intimidated by your fearless attitude because then they may feel you are too much woman for them and you don’t need them. What? Too much woman, who would think such a thing. Silly and insecure men sometimes think that way. They are wired to protect women and their children so if a strong and fearless woman should walk their way they may think twice abot getting involved because she seems like she can take care of herself completely. However, on the other hand they may feel more secure that she can take care of herself and will be better able to let her go every day and live her life because he knows she will be alright. That can make a man feel more secure especially in his choice of women. If he is not around he knows she has the wit and strength to deal with something challenging that maybe he could step in and help out with. You have to be careful though because men want to feel needed so exbibit your fearlessness but allow them to save you if they need to, and allow them to take care of something that does cause you fear. Go ahead and tell people them how you feel, what you want, telling people the truth, be bold and supportive and take care of your responsibilities. That also includes living life in general. I have encountered women who want to stay girls or teenagers because they are afraid to get out there in the world and just live life with all its ups and downs. 

They want someone to take care of them like their dad or like the dad they never had. Just live and be grateful you were given the blessing of life. Women have less fear than men because we can deal with emotions without hopping into bed with every Tom, Dick and Harry and we have painful periods and painful pregnancies and deliveries after 9 months of carrying another life. That’s fearlessness. Show it off girlfriend! Fear can destroy your miracles and hinder you, stop you in your tracks and you can miss out on something truly amazing that may not last forever, but it could change your life for the better and make you a better woman or person. So be bold, and if you have fear ask God for help to get rid of it because none of us were given the spirit of fear. That’s satan’s method of operation, he is afraid of everything that’s why he is so evil and I don’t believe any woman wants to be like that or live like that. Boldness and fearlessness is sexy!

The best to you!

BTW, when I say “sexy” I am not always referring to sex in general. It doesn’t mean just because you are patient or taking care of yourself a man will automatically want to marry you. When I say sexy, I mean attractive or beautiful inside and out, womanly, amazing, wonderful, super cool and special.

If you have any questions about anything above or you want me to expand on something or need clarification shoot me an email at angelcicely@gmail.com or message me on Facebook.