Lust vs. Love

 

So many people in and out of relationships confuse lust with love. If a guy calls me over and wants to have sex with me, he must love me, I mean he called me and no one else this time. If a guy says, “you look so hot in that dress and then talks dirty to me or tells me all the things he wants to do to my body and says he wants to make love to me” he must love me, right? Wrong. This could happen if you do love someone, the second part that is, but love probably came first and I think it should before you ever get to the lust part otherwise the love part may never happen. Love is pure and kind and special and sacred, it doesn’t lie, it doesn’t need to pretend, it doesn’t need to hide, it doesn’t need to coerce and force and it never makes promises it doesn’t intend to keep. Love is just love. 

So when you start out caring for someone before you touch their body then you have the potential to open the passageways of love to come into that relationship and you will respect each other more and love each other more than if you started out lusting after one another. Those that start relationships out with sex usually don’t have much to base that relationship on except sex so they always expect it from each other. If one of them gets sick or old or tired and they don’t want to have sex the chances of them cheating increases because sex is so easily to come by, love is not. So sexing it up first before you get to know someone just means your foundation was based on physical pleasure which wanes periodically and fluctuates from time to time. Lust doesn’t want to take you out on dates and wine and dine you. 

Lust does not want to whisper sweet nothings in your ear and remember them as something sacred and special because they are just words to turn you on. Lust does think about the future and make plans to see it happen working hard to make sure you two get the life you dream of. Lust is lazy. Lust gets tired. Lust can be really nasty and dirty. Lust can smell. Lust can give you diseases like herpes and syphilis, or HIV and Aids. Lust can hurt you if rape happens or sodomy. Lust does not care if you are on your period and it doesn’t care if you are pregnant or sleeping or hurting down there or too busy or not in the mood. Lust doesn’t care if your children are hungry or if you want to be celibate or if you have cancer or some other fatal disease. Lust does care if you look hot on the outside, it cares if you have that body but it doesn’t care if you give the unhot body up for sex. Lust has no filter and it has no boundaries. Lust doesn’t care if you are married and you made a commitment to touch no one else or that you created vows with your significant other or soulmate. Lust doesn’t care if you are a virgin or if you are a teenager or child. Lust just doesn’t give a damn. 

But love, oh love! Love wants to wine and dine you. Love wants to show you off to the world. Love wants to make it known that you are the one and only and you are the only one that matters in the whole wide world. Love gives and gives and gives for special occasions or for no reason at all. Love shows up and is always there even when you make a mistake and are afraid to fix the mistake, love is still there. Love doesn’t repeat wrongs and make you feel bad about things you did in the past. It doesn’t get in your face and force commitments or sexual games and sadistic pleasures or sodomy. Love waits as long as it needs to wait without worrying if love will be there later. Love knows how to hold a hand and touch a face. Love knows how to gaze into the eyes of its lover and share a sweet moment that lust doesn’t know about. Love can say no to sex and enjoy your company without feeling you up to get some play. Love can wait until your period is over. Love knows how to propose and offer a ring in exchange for your hand in marriage, and while lust can do this too to keep getting it’s kicks exclusively so no one else touches you, love sees your future far in advance and lust just knows it will keep you in its bed for a while so you don’t have to go to anyone else. 

Love will cook for you whenever you ask or just do it for the sake of loving you (male or female). Love will take photos with you and make sure everyone knows that you love that person and you want to spend your life with that person. Love knows how to have fun without having to take your clothes off. Love sees no evil, knows no evil, speaks no evil and will fight evil if it needs to. Lust has evil intentions and will even commit evil to get some play just for a few minutes of pleasure. Love is not in a hurry and will compromise and be willing to try something different, something or someone new. If you meet someone who is not willing to wait for you or compromise and change their ideas or views about sex for you then they are all about the lust and they will never love you. If you meet someone who is willing to try things out and see what happens without pressuring you for sexual pleasure then you have found a jewel and they will probably love you. Love waits. Lust does not. 

Love shares secrets and wishes and woes in the hopes that you will share those things too with sincerity and with the intention not to tell another soul or not try to gain something by sharing a secret. Love shares money and shares time and shares space. Love does not hold you hostage and does not keep you under lock and key when you want to be free and have some space for a while. Love does not hold grudges nor resent you and love doesn’t get jealous of your time you spend with others or something you have or have built. Love wants to see you succeed and wants to see you feel good about yourself and wants to compliment you and make you feel amazing. Love wants to help you move forward and gives you time to do that. Love doesn’t judge you for what you have nor what you look like or what you don’t have. Love doesn’t care if you are a celebrity or if you are super famous or if you have the look. Love doesn't turn on its family or friends and make up lies and spread rumors to make you look bad. Love does not plot and scheme against you and try to hurt you because you have something or someone they want. Lust is controlling and demanding and very selfish. Love lets you go and gives freely and ask questions and has your best interests at heart. Love communicates as much as it can and lust ignores and doesn't care about hurting  your feelings.

Love will be there when you are sick as a dog and will let you go if you need to be let go of. Lust will cling so tightly that you feel suffocated and uncomfortable. Love does not need to make demands on you or control the hell out of you and take over your life. Love does not go to your family to win you over before it comes to you first to win you over. Love does not pretend and doesn’t spread rumors and lies and doesn’t care what car you drive or how much money you have in the bank nor what color your skin is. Love doesn’t care how old or young you are, doesn’t care if you are more successful or get more attention, love doesn’t want you to suffer. Love doesn’t want you to cry. Love doesn’t want to hurt you and get mad because of something you said. Love is not insecure and not cowardice. Love is not a part of darkness, does not do black magic, does not use mind control and does not have addictions and sadistic desires, that’s all lust. Lust comes from satan. Love comes from God. Love forgives and lust gets revenge. So if love comes from God and God is pure, clean and perfect and holy why do we lust so much? Why do we listen to the lustful satan that pulls us into the darkest sins of temptation so we lose our minds and look for a therapist to solve all of our problems, or make us run to sick twisted things that cause us to go insane or seek out addictions that make us look crazy. Why do you choose lust over love?